Page 195 - Revelation

Svetlana de Rohan-Levashova. Revelation

She was very nervous and I saw that she was eager to leave our house as soon as
possible to avoid possible questions.

– Please, don’t worry! – I pleaded in a low voice. – Your son does not make
anything up – he sees! The same way I do. You must help him! Please, don’t take him
to a doctor anymore, your boy is special! And doctors will kill all that! Talk to my
grandmother, she’ll explain a lot of things to you... Only don’t take him to a doctor,
please! – I could not stop, because my heart was sick for this little gifted boy, and I
desperately wanted to "save" him no matter what!
– Look, now I shall show something to him and he’ll see and you don’t, because
he has a gift and you don’t. – I quickly recreated Stella’s red dragon.

– Wow! Wow! What-th this?! – The boy began to clap his hands in delight. – It-
tha little dragon, ithn’t it? Like in a fairy-tale? It’th red! Mummy, look! A little dragon!
– Svetlana, I had a gift too. – The neighbour whispered. – But I am not going to
allow my son to suffer because of it like I did. I’ve already suffered enough for both...
He has to have a different life.
I even jumped with surprise! It means that she saw! And knew! I was really
indignant.

– Do you not think that maybe he has a right to choose for himself? In fact it’s his
life! And if you were unable to cope with it, it does not mean that he will be unable
too! You have no right to take his gift away from him before he even understands that
he has it! It looks like murder – you want to kill part of him about which he has not
even heard yet! – I indignantly hissed at her. Everything inside me "reared up" because
of such a frightful injustice!
I wanted very much to convince this stubborn lady to leave her wonderful child
alone, but I clearly saw by her sad but very sure look, that I would hardly succeed in
convincing her of something today and decided to leave the attempt for the moment
and later talk to my grandmother, and maybe we could think of something. I sadly
looked at her and once again asked:

– Please, don’t take him to a doctor. You know that he is not ill!
Her only reply was a strained smile and then she quickly took her boy and went
out, apparently, to take some fresh air which (I was sure) she needed so much.
I knew this neighbour very well. She was a pleasant enough person, but what
staggered me most of all was the fact that she was one of those people who tried to
"isolate" me from their children and badgered me after the ill-fated case with
"lighting the fire"! (Although her eldest son
– I would like to give him his due – never betrayed me and continued to be my friend
despite all prohibitions). As it appeared now she was the one who knew better than
others that I was an absolutely normal, not dangerous, girl! And that I looked for a
correct way out of that "incomprehensible and unknown" in which fate suddenly threw
me, just like she did once.

Beyond all doubt, fear must be a very strong factor in our life, if a person is able
to betray and to turn aside so easily from the one who needs help so much, who could
be easily helped, if it were not for the fear which so deeply crept into one’s heart.

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